thoughts being provoked...cue radio silence

Yeah, so...not that anyone is really in grief over the fact that my blogging this week has been almost nil, but I apologize anyway.
I'm in the process of ironing out details for moving and such...so lots has been going on.

A couple of interesting (to me anyway!) things...
Moving is always stressful, so I once again have found myself with a plate full of recent mishaps that contribute to my frustration levels reaching for the sky. Some of these mishaps are just rotten timing...such as last Friday when I met up with a prof from the college in New Zealand I volunteered at, as he passed through LAX on his way home from visiting his daughter in AZ. It was a lovely opportunity to say hi to an old friend, don't get me wrong. But just one of the handful of things gone awry was that I misunderstood where we were going to meet...
I got in well before his plane arrived, and stood in a little "Wait for Passengers Here" area in the baggage check. Turns out he didn't have baggage to pick up, so he didn't come all the way down to where I was standing. When he called my cell phone and I asked where he was, he said at the exit of the Baggage Check "between one and two and three and four". As I was at terminal 1, I stupidly thought he meant he was standing at an exit outside a different terminal. So I walked (in flip-flops) all the way to terminal 4 before I realized that each airline had baggage checks numbered 1,2, 3, 4 and there was a space between the 1,2 and the 3,4. So I power-walked back in about 15 minutes (and got a bit sweaty) and caught him just as he was trying to call me again... That's one of probably close to 20 stupid things that have happened to me this last week.

This prompted a thought as I was driving to Hollywood a couple of days back and listening to some Muse.
I was thinking about what Christians have to offer to the world, or show how they are different. I was thinking about how we react to the myriad of problems and stresses in our lives...and how maybe a number of things get thrown at us for the specific purpose of modeling what a healthy way to deal with problems/stress is...
That also lead me to the thought of how revolutionary we could all be if we were able to change our mindsets to seeing things through the eyes of faith more...each failure, each mistake, each mishap, each wrong committed against us, etc. as the very catalysts we need to prove our faith is genuine and not of ourselves; as the roaring success it may very well be seen as in the spiritual realm. Could you even imagine how to deal with a people group that percieved every blow as a triumph? I think maybe that's what James had in mind when he talked about considering trials of every kind as pure joy.
Anyway, just thinking-thinking. [sidenote, this train of thought was greatly influenced by the Muse song I was listening to at the moment--"Invincible"..."During this struggle they will pull us down/but please, please let's use this chance to turn things around/and tonight we can truly say, 'Together we're Invincible.'"]

I have also encountered so many car accidents this week, it's crazy. Yesterday, I think I contributed to one as I waited to make a left turn into my work's parking lot. Traffic backed up behind me, and after I did park, I heard a few scary sounds, then a siren. A minivan had flipped over a block behind the traffic light. At least no one was hurt...

And tonight at 'canvas group' we had some serious conversation about the first Christian church in Acts and what that translates to today. Yes, I'm sure some of you are thinking--"old hat!", but the conversation really inspired several fresh trains of thought in my head. It was refreshing...even if I was being nagged by a headache for the duration. I'm very excited about taking the opportunity to build into this group of people for more than just a year... Moving around so much has it's advantages, but it's been a long time since I could say, "I think I'm going to be involved with this group of people for the remainder of my forseeable life" or something like that. Of course, the joke might be on me, and maybe I'll be moving again next year...I dunno...but the promise/hope is there, and it makes me happy.
Yay.

So...yeah...moving into a new apartment this weekend, and I'm not sure how long before I have regular internet access again. So...cue radio silence. It might only be a few days, but if it's a few weeks, I'll be sure to [benenvolently] exploit my current pals for the chance to at least give out an update or two and to check my email.

For now...I go to eat Spinach Salad and watch a few episodes of an Invader Zim dvd my coworker insisted I borrow. :)
Peace Out, my Peeps.

[P.S. I lifted the above googled image from a really-cool looking blog:
http://www.jimmartin.typepad.com/ ...search for an image for "Pause" and find another amazing Christian-influenced blog--what are the odds? :) ]

God Writing #23: Balancing Act

7/15/06

When I was a kid, one of my favorite pieces of playground equipment was the teeter-totter (or "see-saw" for some). This simple, yet thrilling vehicle of amusement best works with two people. Each sits on different ends of a long board and takes turns weighing their partner down, and then being bounced back up into the air. It's a challenge to enjoy a teeter-totter alone, but I would indulge from time to time... I remember walking up to the center of the board and trying to stand on the exact fulcrum, thereby keeping the board parallel with the ground, and maintaining a short-lived balancing act.
I think that's a good metaphor for many things in life. We muddle through a variety of teeter-totters with their essential duality--neither end being better or more important than the other. The ideal is to strive toward that fulcrum point and balance. Inevitably, our weight shifts somehow, and one side plunges to the ground, so we counterbalance and strive to find that point of stability again and again.

This morning I was thinking of a scene from one of my favorite movies--Ferris Bueller's Day Off. If you haven't seen the film, this might not make a lot of sense, but bear with me...
There's a moment where Ferris (played by Matthew Broderick) asks his best friend Cameron (played by Alan Ruck) to make a phone call for him. Cameron agrees--under protest--but his performance is quite unsatisfactory in Ferris's opinion...which yields a slap or two during the process.
When the phone is hung up, Cameron demands, "Why'd you hit me?!" A frustrated Ferris retorts with, "Where's your brain?!" The dialogue is repeated with increased intensity: "Why'd you hit me?!!" "Where's your brain?!!"
I think this scene exemplifies the struggle between the weighty issues of Truth and Love. Both questions are valid and neither seem to claim sovereignty. Indeed, these two issues seem to form a sort of divine wrestling match that continually plays out in our daily lives.

From my observations of humans [alien that I am--Bwahahahaha!!!], I've decided that most of us by nature are rooted on one side or the other.
Truth-upholders might be more Type A personalities with Love-spreaders countering as Type Bs. Of course, I also realize this could just be my opinion and have no concrete basis in reality, so decide for yourselves...

These two opposite ends of the spectrum seem to both be very important to the Lord, and indeed both parts of His character.
1 John 4:8 tells us that "God IS Love."
In John 14:6, Jesus says, "I am the way and The TRUTH and the life..."

Scripture also instructs us to incorporate both into our walks.
In Zechariah 8:16, the Israelites are instructed, "These are the things you are to do: speak the truth to each other..."
Psalm 51:6 speaks of God's will in our lives: "Surely you desire truth in the inner parts; you teach me wisdom in the inmost place."
In Leviticus 18:19, God instructs the Israelites to "...love your neighbor as yourself." The New Testament is literally packed with additional exhortations to love others--from brothers and sisters in faith to even our enemies.

Working at the coffeeshop that I do is a wonderful experience, but it can also be a stressful one. Probably 75% of the stress stems from the struggles of working with a diverse team of people--both culturally and in regard to personality. [this diversity is also one of the coolest things about working there too]
A couple of days ago, as I was correcting a small mistake a fellow employee had made, I muttered to my manager, "Some days it's like swimming upstream!" It's almost comical sometimes how if I am in the process of trying to complete a task between our steady flow of customers, I can strategically place something down and moments later have a well-meaning coworker use their free minute of time to completely undo what I had just started. Yes, hillarious to an audience member watching--if we were a tv show--but frustrating to me...especially when it happens multiple times in a day. In my mind I often feel like screaming Ferris Bueller's words--"Where's your Brain?!"

But it's not worth slapping someone (even figuratively) to get my point across.
I'm a very by-the-book, rule-abiding sort. There are times when it's appropriate for me to share a nugget of truth with a coworker, and thereby challenge them to change.
On the flipside, I have a few coworkers who are all about the Love. Sometimes it's good for me to be reminded--through them--about what's really important in life...and work.
[I'm foregoing sharing a specific example on this side, just in case it would get anyone in mild trouble for not strictly adhering to rules...]

We all have something to learn from those in the other camp, as well as something to offer them in return.

While that perfect balancing-on-the-fulcrum point seldom lasts long, we are healthier people when we stick to the middle of the teeter-totter board instead of standing on one end.
Ephesians 4 offers a good map to keep us centered:
"As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received. Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. There is one body and one Spirit--just as you were called to one hope when you were called--one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.
But to each one of us grace has been given as Christ apportioned it. This is why it says: 'When he ascended on high, he led captives in his train and gave gifts to men.' (What does 'he ascended' mean except that he also descended to the lower, earthly regions? He who descended is the very one who ascended higher than all the heavens, in order to fill the whole universe.) It was he who gave some to be apostles, some to be prophets, some to be evangelists, and some to be pastors and teachers, to prepare God's people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up until we all reach unity in the faith and in knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.
Then we will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of men in their deceitful scheming. Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will in all things grow up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ. From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work." (vs 1-16)

Today's Prevalent Mood: Frustrated

Isn't this a great pic?! I found it (googled) off of a German website or something like that... [Foxx, I swear, this is not a dig at you! Ha!]
So I had one of those days...
Not bad because of anything catastrophic going down, but just marked by a few varied hours of frustration.
It started when I arrived early for a meeting to sign the lease on my soon-to-be-new apartment...and had to wait for about about 45 minutes as the other 2 people needing to be present were delayed ...
Things came and went throughout the day that caused me frustration too. I exchanged some strong, albeit benevolent words with a co-worker who seems to enjoy perpetually trying to "get my goat". Usually I just laugh/blush and shake my head as I give up, but today I dug my heels in.
It's all good, but in the end I mostly just feel like a punk.
I was almost falling asleep as I drove home from work (about an hour late) tonight, but here I am online and still feeling like a frustrated punk.
Aren't days like this FUN?!
Argh! [That's sarcasm if you couldn't tell...]
So I think the best thing for me is to retire for the night and take tomorrow easy until I head into work in the afternoon.
Hopefully I'll wake up feeling UNlike a punk.

Oh, and for those of you who have passed through the Rock at one time or another, I'm excited to announce that Greg L. and his family are scheduled to arrive in LA tomorrow! (er...today technically...Sunday) Hooray! Please pray for them to adjust to this place and find an apartment to rent ASAP.

Post #2 of the night--diversity is good, and commentary on Little Miss Sunshine

It's been an interesting day or two for a few different reasons...
Don't worry, I won't give you an exhaustive list. :)

I think this will work better if I intersperse my thoughts rather than try to separate them...so...

Diversity is something I greatly appreciate in life. Every now and then I feel like I have these divine sorts of moments where I just get it...how we are all made differently, and yet we fit together, and that's the beautiful thing. I don't see things the way you do. But, if you share your viewpoint with me, my eyes might open up to it, and my realm of sight expand an inch or two. OR, I might just totally not understand it at all, but still love the fact that you see it so clearly.
Am I being too vague, or do you follow me?

Last night I got together with a few of the guys I work with. During the ensuing conversations, I couldn't help but smile at this very thing. At one point, G. said something that made H. totally bust a gut laughing. I was clueless as to what was funny. Later, H was voicing some commentary (think subconscious Homer Simpson) that made me completely crack up, but that no one else seemed to notice. I love that crazy sort of give-and-take in friendships. :)
And tonight at Canvas Group, as E. was leading our Bible Study, if I was a fly on the wall I might be tempted to think, "Ugh, what a flop!" But it completely wasn't! The things he brought up ignited a few sort of introspective revelations/reminders/clarifications/new lines of thought in my mind, and probably in a few of the other people that were around.
As I was leaving, E. thanked me for my involvement in the discussion that was had, and made a comment about me being able to have taught the thing instead of him.
I sort of shrugged that off--thanked him, but told him he did a fine job--and was thinking as I drove home..."I bet he has no idea how his unique line of thinking has inspired me--and from a bit of passage I've read many times already..." In other words, even if it had been me to present the same exact material, there would have been something missing that only E. was able to bring to the floor.

Speaking of canvas group, I also got a chance to gobble down some Korean food before it started as E and his wife are of Korean descent. Korean curry and this familiar-tasting meat...mmm...so good. Is it weird that tasting these things again after a few years made me almost want to cry?...

"What about the movie, already?!" You ask.
Getting there...I swear!

Ok, so I saw the film Little Miss Sunshine last night with coworkers JP and G. Excellent film! It was funny and poignant--the best of both worlds.
I love movies that let you get inside the characters (a la The Royal Tennenbaums), and this movie did just that! (Plus it's directed by Johnathan Dayton and Valerie Faris whose names I recognize because of their former production of music videos--including Neil Finn's "She Will Have Her Way".)
Steve Carrelle's performance is great, as is Greg Kinnear's (so much so that **I** wanted to punch him) and the rest of the cast's...the performance that I think stole the show though was the kid who played Duane.
Duane is a teenage boy who doesn't have any friends (he says he hates everyone), is constantly reading Nietzche (excuse any misspelling) and who doesn't speak as he took a vow of silence until such time as he graduates high school and gets into the air force.
****Spoiler****
There's one scene where Duane realizes he's colorblind and therefore unable to fly jets. He flips out completely and his inner turmoil is so convincing that I was blinking back tears.
At the end of his freakout, his mom is unable to sweet-talk him back into their vehicle (they are all on their way to a little beauty pageant). His little sister Olive simply walks over to him, puts an arm around him, and lays her head on his shoulder.
Even though just seconds before, Duane told his family he hated them all and called them all losers, Olive's love brings him back around. In only a second he regains his composure and says, "OK, let's go."

That made me think about my big brother a bit. I remember chasing him around when we were little, trying to give him a kiss. Our family wasn't big on affection, so I learned in short order to quit trying. And we aren't exactly close.
But yet, I think I value my brother's opinion over that of most people that I know. I got a voicemail from him tonight (interesting timing), wherein he just called me to see how things were going. He didn't need anything, he just thought he'd call. That's the first time ever. And again, thinking about it much makes me watery-eyed.

I got a letter from my Grandma in the mail yesterday too. And the night before I got a letter from the group home I worked at in MN. I had written to the residents and staff shortly after moving out here, and was surprised at how much I had missed them. I kind of gave up on getting any correspondance back though, so it was really touching to get this letter.

Another great thing about the movie (yes, circling back to that!) is that at the end, the family exhibits the importance of love and devotion over caring what anyone else thinks. It might be a tad bit uncouth, but it's still a fantastic example. I almost wished I could be at this fake pageant to stand up and clap along with Olive's dance routine as well. :)

This morning when I got up for work I felt more than a bit Blah. Emotional Hangover or something...I don't know. But despite the yucky heart-state I found myself in for the first half of the day, it's all been good, these musings and social paths...
That's all I have to say for now. Sue me if you think I'm being long-winded...but it IS my blog. ;)

Hooray for upcoming concerts!

Ok, so...
When I was in New Zealand a few years back, I encountered some fantastic music.
One such band was an Ozzie group called Powderfinger.
SO GOOD!
Their cd Vulture Street has stayed in steady rotation for me since...some songs were so good it's like I felt them in my heart...slice me open and watch me bleed...you know?

This is a Youtube link to their video that first caught my eye back on C4...
"(Baby I've Got You) on My Mind":
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vu3bBqB-g68

And here's a video of their song "My Happiness" (from their first album--also a good one--Oddysey Number 5) performed live in Vancouver:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VzHzuz-qGto

So...I'm not writing up a review on either album (maybe one day!), but I do have some exciting--at least to me!--news.
At work today, my manager was skimming through the pages of a LA periodical that announces upcoming concerts. As we chatted about a few upcoming acts, the announcement for BERNARD FANNING jumped off the page at me!
I knew I knew who he was, but it took me a second to place him (and the accompanying picture helped...). BF is the lead singer from Powderfinger!!!
Woo!!
So he's performing at The Roxy on Monday (I think) Sept 18th...tickets are like $18 and I really want to go. I might be able to strong-arm my manager (a fellow appreciator of good music) to go with me, but if any of you--my pals out there--are interested, please let me know!

Here's a video for a single from Bernard's solo album (one of those rare tunes I've found I enjoy from the word GO), "Wish You Well":
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9gU77S8n7VA

and in slightly, less-exciting concert news...
Ticketmaster tells me that Kasabian is going to be performing in Hollywood on October 11th. I'd also love to see them...any takers?
Here's a link to "Club Foot"--a song that was meant to blast out of your car speakers:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YeMyH-E5RKo

and a final-final concert note...if any of you LA peeps are free this Sunday night (I'll be working)...I encourage you to check out the goings-on at Sunset Junction and the El Cid. There is a group called Underwater City People playing around 11pm...if you catch their show, let me know what you think! I intend to see them live someday myself...

What would Jesus Eat?...

In whatever context I find myself in, I tend to become the organizer of most social activities I want to be a part of.
As in, I'm the one saying--"Hey! Why don't we get together with so-and-so at such-and-such a time?" Doesn't sound like a big deal, does it? Well, the older I get, the more complicated the procedure seems to become. I guess that's because adults have more complicated lives than 12 year olds. Plus, maybe my control-freak/ACoA tendencies surface in that I can't handle just sitting around saying "What do you want to do? I don't know--what do you want to do?" and thereby wasting valuable time. I also can't stand just saying "figure it out!" to the other members of the party and then watch as they get frustrated with each other and decide it would be more enjoyable for all to just not go out at all.
So I play the middle-man, make the phonecalls, and try to reach a happy medium that works for everyone.
It's a skill (?can I call it that? 'trait' maybe????) I both love and hate.
Today I got some more practice at it.

That's all expostion. Yes, for real. Not the point to my post at all. Or, if anything, a side point at best. The real focus is much more simple.
I just got back from a quick walk to the 7-11 on my current street corner. Even though I'm planning to meet up with a few people for dinner in a couple of hours, I decided to get myself a can of Coca-cola and a Snickers Ice cream bar.
As I grabbed my treats and started back for the apartment, I ripped into the Snickers bar. With each bite, I felt like the Queen of my world...forget any troubles, responsibilities, opportunities, etc. I was focused on simply enjoying my icecream and chocolate, with the promise of a bit of fizzy glee to follow it up. [Or as my pal Foxx would call it, "Bad, Brown Beverage"]
As I neared the end of the Snickers, my thoughts turned to Jesus. There's a lot of his life that we aren't privy too as only slices of his time on earth are recorded in the Gospels for us. I thought about how he was fully human and inevitably had to deal with his fair share of stress (and all the more as he began, established, and worked through his ministry).
I wondered if Jesus ever partook of a comfort food or two to see him through a rough patch.

My first instinct is probably not. He didn't sin, afterall, right? And turning to food as a means of escape is emphatically looked down on by most experts.
But at the same time, is it ultimately wrong to enjoy a simple bit of something that in a way reflects God's creation?
Hmm...interesting, if frivolous question, eh?

I googled this pic from an article on comfort foods which has the interesting factoid that comfort foods for men and women differ. Men prefer warm, heartier meals which might remind them of their mother's cooking (is that still true in our current culture?!!!) and women seem to prefer foods that don't take effort to prepare--i.e. chocolate, ice cream, candy. Interesting.

Time to go brush my teeth...

A Slice of K-Life

Since one of the reasons I started this blog was to keep my friends up to date on my life (instead of sending out 50 different emails with the same general lines), I figure I'm about due for an update.
For those of you who might happen to skim my blog, but not really know me well, this will probably be boring. So go eat a cookie instead!

Alright...life.

On the top of my list I can tell you that I'm 80% sure I'm going to be moving to an apartment in Koreatown (that's just south of Hollywood...er, maybe a part of it, but on the way south side) by the beginning of September.
This will be great in that it would cut down my commute time by about 3/4, and I wouldn't have to live like a vagabond with most of my personal belongings sitting in boxes in storage.
The apartment is a 2 bedroom, and I have a roommate lined up. Of course the rent is a bit steep for just the two of us, so we're hoping to rope in a 3rd roommate (interested?!!!) who could set up camp in the majority of the living room space. I'm pretty confident we can find a 3rd roommate, but it is rather a step of faith to sign up for an apartment that I know I can't afford if something goes awry.
Then there's the component that my future roommate, though very nice/responsible/polite, isn't exactly a quick-on-the-trigger sort of person. Our future landlord keeps getting stressed out because she has to wait for Roommate to follow through on stuff. We were planning on signing the lease later today (Tuesday), but Roommate found out she couldn't get out of work early to make the long drive to Burbank to meet up with Future landlord. Future landlord doesn't want to meet us separately, and my schedule is almost the opposite of Roomate's. So we're in a bit of a pickle currently, and I'm hoping something works out soon. What really sucks for me is that Future Landlord is starting to get a bit snippy with me for Roommate's laidback attitude, and I feel like I'm being way pushy when I communicate with Roommate to try to get her to get going.
It's enough to make me want to say, "Screw it! I'll find my own place!" But, that's not being a mature adult, is it? And plus...I don't want to exploit my friends S&V to milk them for more hospitality than I should.
So, I'm trying to ride out the tension and just trust all will be cool.

It's easier to do when I'm fully rested. Last week wasn't so good for that. On Thursday I got up early so I could bring my car (aka Cash) into Hollywood to get a few repairs done. The mechanics were lovely, but it did take up a 5 hour chunk of my day, so besides being tired, I also had to bum around and then go straight to work.
I had the next day off--Friday. However, our church had a women's retreat that I had signed up for. I even agreed to get to the hotel where we were having it @ 2pm so I could help set up. I set my alarm so I could get up early again, and have time for a jog and to do my laundry before leaving for the retreat. But the joke was on me, as I went out to my car, it wouldn't start.
My friend S was in charge of some stuff at the retreat and had a million errands to run herself. So I tried to be productive and not fret too much in the space of two hours while I waited for a chance to get my car jumped. Once it was jumped, I drove to a mechanic who fixed the problem easily and didn't charge me. Very nice, but I still felt frustrated as it seems like I and/or my friends have been plagued with car/driving issues for the last handful of retreats I've been on.
I had to cancel on helping with the setup, but it all ended well.
The retreat was a good time, though ultimately short (just under 24 hours). I didn't sleep well (no surprise).
As I left on Saturday afternoon, I got a call from a coworker who was feeling really bad and wanted me to cover her shift. So I agreed to come in after running a couple of errands. Kudos to my pal Scott G. who didn't kill me for cancelling on meeting up with him for dinner that night...
Sunday I was scheduled to close, so I had plans to go to early church. That was night #3 of not getting enough sleep. I dragged my butt to church, and even had the chance to get a new coworker to come along with me. Then after church I whiled away about 4 hours because I didn't want to waste the gas and time to drive back to my current residence before reporting for work. I really wished I felt safe sleeping in my car, but I'm way too paranoid for that.
This is the sort of activity that makes my life a blur. Wait a second--it's almost September?! How did that happen????
Consequently, I didn't get any God-writing in this weekend. Bugger!

Work is generally going well. There are plans being worked on to get me into the RMT program in the next few months (meaning I would become an assistant manager). I'll keep you updated.
Things can be pretty stressful at times, but that's Starbucks in Hollywood... Tonight I really felt like I wanted to break something, which is a feeling I seldom get. Of course, LA seems to bring out my anger like nothing else. Anyway, the good thing is that these windows of stress are forgotten (at least for me) moments after they end. So then, I'm good.
I'm really enjoying getting to know my coworkers better. There are many interesting/cool individuals that I work with. I'm attempting to take the step of trying to hang out with some of them outside of work...a mix of ministry and friendship, if you know what I mean. Maybe ministry is the wrong word...I dunno. There are a couple of young guys I work with that have really had crummy stuff happen to them. It's the kind of thing that makes me wish I could just make everything be alright for them...at least these days I realize that the tension of trusting God with redeeming these life experiences for them makes sense. (Am I making sense? It is past my bedtime afterall...) Sometimes I wish I was the kind of person that could get away with giving people heartfelt hugs all the time...but that's not really how I roll...ah well, maybe if a chance presented itself...

Speaking about friendships and such, these last few days I have found myself thinking a lot about my friends I met in New Zealand. Every now and then I'll go through a patch where I almost subconsciously feel like we're still living in community together back at MTC... It's an interesting thing.
I am 90% sure I'm going to get the chance to meet up with Peter Given (an instructor from MTC) during his stopover at LAX this Friday, on his way back to New Zealand. That should be great! :)

Lastly...what have I been listening to as of late? A lot of Muse. I got their latest cd (Blackholes and Revelations) and their previous cd to Absolution (Showbiz) last week at Amoeba music. I got quite a few cds actually (I had a gift certificate from a generous friend), but Muse has definitely gotten the most airtime thus far.
Tracks 1-4 on Blackholes are my favorites so far... My pal Andrew pointed out to me that Muse reminded him of a modern-day Queen, and I sure see his point on this new album.
It is a bit unfortunate though when I get the chorus for track 1 ("Take a Bow") stuck in my head as the lyrics are..."Burn in hell, yeah you'll burn in hell...you'll burn in hell for your sins".
Not exactly a line I'd be happy to absentmindedly let fly out of my mouth, you know?

So thus concludes my corner of the world for tonight. I'd love to hear from you as well, if you have the time to shoot me an email or give me a call.
Much love to you, my friends of every stripe...!

God Writing #22: "Reach out and touch faith..."--Depeche Mode

[sorry for the delay on getting this typed up--it's been a heck of a weekend! Then again, maybe no one noticed at all...in which case, forget I said anything!]

7/8/06
I'm a person who gives up.
Easily.
I might dig my heels in for a minute, but all too easily I just let go.
I think it's a survival tactic. Life brings disappointment. It's inevitable. When you give up, it's easier to safeguard yourself from disappointment's piercing arrows. You can't be heartbroken over something you never invested much hope in to begin with. And those things you did dare to dream about become easier to bounce back from if you balanced them with a healthy degree of skepticism from the start. Broken promises? No sweat. We're all imperfect humans. Love lost? Ah well, it probably is for the best... Goals left by the wayside? Reality beckons.
But the closer I grow to God, the more I hate this quality about myself.

Last fall I participated in a Bible study at Eaglebrook [my most recent MN church] that was written by Beth Moore. The subject was all about Faith. I got my butt kicked left and right--but in a good way. I learned a lot.
Part of the Bible study involved reading Romans Chapter 4 something like 20 times. The passage talks about how Abraham's faith was credited to him as righteousness.
"If, in fact, Abraham was justified by works, he had something to boast about--but not before God. What does the Scripture say? 'Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness.'" (v.2)

Before the Bible study I was well-familiar with the principle that our works, or 'good deeds', don't bring us closer to God. We are not righteous because of what we do, but instead what we do reflects Jesus' righteousness in us.
The new and incredibly interesting flipside to this though was that Scripture seems to point out that there is a sort of currency we keep in our heavenly bank accounts--Faith. "The words 'it was credited to him' were written not for him alone, but also for us, to whom God will credit righteousness--for us who believe in him." (vs. 23-24)
Romans 1:17 also discusses this point--"For in the gospel a rightousness from God is revealed, a righteousness that is by faith from first to last, just as it is written: 'The righteous shall live by faith.'" (That's a referenece to Hab 2:4) If I'm not mistaken, this is the famous verse that turned Martin Luther's world upside-down and birthed the Reformation.
Again, echoing the truth is 2 Cor 5:7, "We live by faith, not by sight."
So if my understanding is correct (You can decide for yourselves on that), this means that the one way we can really please God and more further become the people he created us to be is for us to believe what He tells us. In other words, hold onto Faith in Him and His promises.
That can seem like an easy thing when we're at church or in the middle of a Bible Study. But where it matters most is where it's hardest.

Going back to Romans 4, vs 18 tells us "Against all hope, Abraham in hope believed and so became the Father of many nations..." Faith unchallenged is not really faith. I think one of my friends once told me that.
And how often I fail. when all signs point to NO I too often bow my head, lose my smile, drop my shoulders, and accept the No. True faith would be gritting my teeth and holding onto that Divine "Yes" no matter what.

Sometimes I feel like for each test of faith I pass, I fail three more. Praise the Lord for His patience though...He hasn't kicked me out of his family yet!
Of course there are bound to be times that I misunderstand too. As Beth Moore puts it though, "If I err, let me err on the side of Faith." Better to trust God for something He's not going to give than to not trust him at all. I'm not advocating lunacy in the name of faith though either. I think in our hearts we know the difference.

In Luke 8:22-25, Jesus is out at sea with his disciples and falls asleep. A tremendous storm occurs and his disciples are anxious enough to wake him up because they are convinced they are about to drown. Jesus calms down the elements and then addresses them--"Where is your faith?" I think in some versions it says something like, "Oh ye of Little Faith!"
I feel like that's a banner I could wear. For the sake of heart-clearing, I want to repent of some common faith-lapses in my life...

Lord, I'm truly sorry that I too often don't take you at your word and lack faith that
I am a blessing to others
My prayers make a difference
I can be and am used as your mouthpiece
I am marriage-material
People care about me as much as I care about them
I'm making the most of my life and am on the "right path".

That might be a vague, but rather encompassing list. Proverbs 12:12 says (NLT), "Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but when dreams come true, there is life and joy." I want to have the kind of faith that sticks through to the end and receives the prize it has waited for.

At the Rock, we used to sing a worship song called "Sweet Embrace"." One of the lines from it is, "When I'm faithless, You are faithful..." and that's it. That's the bottom line between God and man. For as many times as we fail, He holds fast. By his love, he doesn't hold my failings agains me--what's more, instead of turning away from me, He chases after me to "drown me" in His "Sweet Embrace."

I guess Faith, in essense, is like a glimpse of God. It's the one constant in our world of change and dark shadows. It's a gift he gives us to pull us through every page of life. And at the very least, that is something I can and do believe whole-heartedly--He will give me more Faith if I ask for it.

Another melodramatic offering from Moi

[disclaimer: ok, so I saw no copyright on this googled image, despite it's professional look, so I hope I'm in the clear...!]

The Battle

A tiny breath
navigates this crowded air
and makes its way into my lungs
having been sent from yours

It carries your fingerprint
and seeps into my blood
infecting me
with an addictive appetite
that will not be satisfied

My forcefield is deactivated
and in its stead
rises a relentless magnetism
that pulls me to you
even as I fight it

What strain of madness is this
that my logic spits upon
but to which the weaker parts of my heart
offer footing?

Why this monstrous urge
to reach out my hand to yours?
or dive into your eyes
and therein hide my love...?

Surely there must be some supplement
to counteract this chemical reaction.
Show me your weak spots
and ugliness
and I'll pray it serves as the syrum
rather than a hook in my flesh
that would drag me deeper down

I will find strength
as my feet stand on this Rock
that proclaims victory over every battle.
My knees might tremble and shake
but they will not bend
to this un-nameable electricity.

I grind my teeth
and steel myself
as I wait for this storm to pass
couting the breaths till it does...

And when exhausted, I fall asleep
and You haunt me even then,
Innocence will be my shield
as I lean into your phantom
and count it not a sin.

Shakespeare Rocks my World

Yes, I'm one of those...
Perhaps not half as much as you may think, nor a quarter as much as I'd like to be, but yet the fact remains: I dig Old Will.
In high school I took College Preparatory English--despite the fact I had no intention of going to a university--just so I could delve into a few more of his works. In hindsight, what a gift. Those were the brief hours of my tenure when school didn't feel so much like a prison anymore.

So why am I blathering on?
Well, last night I went with my friend Shalom to see a Shakespeare in the Park presentation of Hamlet. This all went down at Barnsdall Park in Hollywood...and for free! Yippee!!!
http://www.independentshakespeare.com/

I must say it was a rather brilliant performance...which brings me to the first pic in this post. No, Rik Mayall was not the leading star, but the guy who did play Hamlet seemed incredibly familiar to me. The best I could figure was that he reminded me of Rick from the Young Ones...he brought a very Englishy-sullen-tongue-in-cheek feel to Hamlet. I wasn't sure I'd appreciate that at first, but I was soon won over.

The woman who played Ophelia was rather amazing as well. Her portrayal of heartbreak brought me to tears. I think that's a good thing...

As I watched the play (my first live Shakespeare experience), it really hit me how Shakespeare was such a master of the English language. Moreover, how skillfully he packed each thought, and how many pearls of wisdom and questions of human existence are sewn into the work.

I remember back in 2000 I attended my first rock concert in Minneapolis [The Stereophonics and the Charlatans UK @ The Quest]. While waiting in line, I felt this sense of kinship with those around me that was hitherto unexperienced in my life. Last night I got the same sort of feel...hooray for Shakespeare and those who still replicate his work so many years after his death...!

God Writing #21: 21st Century Christianity and Confronting the Pharisee Within

[Nevermind where I got this pic, just appreciate its relevance to what I'm about to say...]

7/2/06

Sometimes it feels overwhelming to be a 21st century, Post-modern Christian. There are SO many areas in life to incorporate into our faith. From a holistic standpoint, I guess it would be more accurate to say there's no area of life that shouldn't be directed by our faith.

Even just 100 years ago, people ate what was available. There wasn't a whole lot of choice in the matter, and life was such hard work that a bit of fat could be good for a person. Now--at least in technologically advanced countries--we have a plethora of food options at our fingertips. But our lives aren't as labor-intensive, so many of us end up eating more than we need. Plus, having refined and preserved food comes at a price--we rob our food of real nutrients and douse them with chemicals all in the name of convenience. We see a direct correlation between diet and health, reiterating the Biblical "You reap what you sow" law found in Galatians 6:7 (albeit in a different context, but I think it still carries over).
Each meal becomes a question of good stewardship. Beyond the immediate concerns of what to eat and drink lie social concerns. Are we buying products from companys that exploit people or even animals? How does each dollar we spend affect the rest of the world? And for those groups who are being advantage of, how do we step in to become their advocates?

How do we balance our time? Between daily time with God, work, chores, time with family & friends, exercise, and commutes, how do we divide the 24 hours we're given each day? What's the deciding factor in choices where we could take an hour to exercise (and thus pursue health) or the same hour to volunteer (pursue service) or to catch up with a friend (pursue fellowship/relationships)?

How do we prioritze our prayer? Personal needs and goals get pushed back by prayer requests for others. Praying for friends is countered by praying for people in the news--victims of earthquakes and car crashes and suicide bombers. Our grandparents lived in a world where they knew little about the goings-on outside of their immediate communities. We live in a world where a satellite picture of almost every square mile of this globe can be accessed over the internet.

The black and white moral guidelines of even the '50s are becoming an increasingly blurry gray. We strive to live relevant, yet counter-cultural lives in our communities. We seek to exemplify Jesus' love to all while still seeking after his righteousness. We look for the boldness to share our faith with others while holding onto the humility that reminds us we have much to learn from the same people.

It feels complicated, I think, and sometimes so confusing it's hard to know where to stand...

Our Lord is not blind to this. Jesus may not have had an ipod and a blackberry, but his example still offers us guidance today.
What's more, as I've been stewing over this subject during the past few days, I have been reminded that I've sort of got a backwards viwpoint on the subject--and that could be the cause of much of my stress...
Essentially, I'm looking at all of these external components (choices) and viewing them as flowing into the person. As in what a person does, reveals what's in that person's heart, but the emphasis is on the outside factor. Instead, I should view the emphasis as being on the heart, and everything emanating from that.

See, once again I've been caught. My true nature is laid out there...Kristie the Pharisee. I can get so caught up in the external that I forget what's really important.
Admittedly, I used to be the kind of person who thought a person that called themself a Christian had to be a pristine example of obedience--no smoking, no drinking (or at least no getting drunk), no swearing, giving a tithe of their income for offering, etc.

The Pharisees in Jesus' day probably had a much longer list of rules, but it's essentially the same mistake. God doesn't put a qualifier on who can come to Him. He doesn't say, "Gee, I'd really love to have a relationship with you, but I just can't handle people who _________. Why don't you give me a call when you clean yourself up...?"
NO! Jesus made a name for himself by seeking out the blatant sinners of Jewish society (namely tax collectors and prostitutes) to offer his friendship to. He defends his motive to the Pharisees in Matthew 9:12-13: "On hearing this, Jesus said, 'It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick. But go and learn what this means: "I desire mercy, not sacrifice." For I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.'"
That's what 12-step programs are bult upon. Participants seek a higher power to help them gain victory over their addictions.

We all--mature Christians and atheists alike--are daily affected by this disease called Sin. Christ offers us victory and His righteousness covers us, but while we live in these tents of flesh within this broken universe, we have to fight the Good Fight. None of us is in the clear quite yet.
In Luke 11, Jesus gives the Pharisees quite a tongue-lashing. He proclaims six 'woes' and though each is worded differently, it's easy to discern a common theme. The prelude in vs. 39-40 says, "Then the Lord said to him, 'Now then, you Pharisees clean the outside of the cup and dish, but inside you are full of greed and wickedness. You foolish people! Did not the one who made the outside make the inside also?'"
See, Pharisees were/are legalistic and nit-picky. They can't see the forest for the trees. I remain ever-thankful that God opened my eyes and taught me the truth...

Ultimately, everything should flow OUT from our hearts. Every choice we make is directed by what lies within.
Luke 6:45: "The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks."

The Lord promises to transform our ugly hearts into things of beauty if we give Him the chance. Ezekiel 36:26 is an Old testament promise that I think we can still claim today. "I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh." I used to feel like my heart was stone, but I've definitely experienced the transformation. Thanks be to God! :) The passage also goes on..."And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws. You will live in the Land I gave your forefathers; You will be my people and I will be your God. I will save you from all your uncleanness..." (vs. 27-29a)

David's words in Psalm 51 show that he believed this principle too. I love this Psalm, and in the Lutheran church I grew up in, we used to sing a chunk of it in every service. "Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit to sustain me." (vs. 10-12)

So...Life seems to perpetually get more complicated. While the questions of what it means to be a Christian in different areas of life continue to multiply, the answer seems to be as simple for us in the year 2006 AD as it was in 2006 BC. When we put our hearts and souls into God's hands--cooperate with what His Spirit is doing in us, and remain in communion with Him--we need not sweat the details. Things come into a divine sort of alignment...whether we choose to eat a Twinkie, or an apple....

"Don't waste your time or time will waste You..."--Muse

A quick shout out for another KR-approved band: Muse. (I have a review of their Absolution cd a within the archives here...haven't gotten the new cd yet, but it's going to happen sooner rather than later...in the meantime I've been listening to Absolution a lot lately again....)

Their latest single: "Knights of Cydonia"
I have the pleasure of hearing it over the airwaves on LA's Indie 103.1 radio station (hooray for a real radio station that plays good music in these parts!).
Here's an article about the video:
http://www.vh1.com/news/articles/1538206/
20060809/muse_uk_.jhtml?headlines=true

Here's a link to youtube if you want to watch it:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jV1bRfLHA3A

Muse also has some videos on their website: www.muse.mu, but as of yesterday, this one didn't seem to be up yet.

And here's a link to a short 8-minute mini-documentary on You tube:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uTI2QsNuiN8
Mostly it's a few songs, but there are a few interview blurbs...and a shot of the drummer playing in a pool of water.

And lastly, this is a You tube link to the video for "Muscle Museum":
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_BuaMHjQgSw
This video is BRILLIANT and was my first introduction to Muse back when I was watching MTV2 in Wisconsin. I need to get this album too.
Foxx, when you read this, I command you to at least watch this one! Haha.

Ok, now on with the rest of my day...

My new favorite Dish and some Lady in the Water commentary

It's official, everyone.
I could eat Rad Na with chicken until I exploded, and still be hungry for more.
This is a Thai dish, and over the past month it has become my new culinary addiction. I had some again for lunch today at a restaurant in Pasadena...add the red hot sauce (I guess that's not really a Thai thing, but it reminds me of the hot sauce my Korean friends introduced me to during my time in New Zealand, so I think it's LOVELY) and I would call it Satisfaction on a Plate.
There's a little Thai restaurant across from my church in Hollywood where I first encountered this dish. Pam--the Thai hostess/waitress at the place with an AMAZING memory--told me that most white Americans don't like this dish. She said most who order it are disappointed...only a few who have actually been to Thailand seem to enjoy it.
All the more reason for me to advocate such an underdog, misunderstood plate of tastebud delight. TRY IT, friends. If you don't like it, sue me...just send me your leftovers. YUM!

In other news, I finally got the chance to see the latest M. Night Shaymala (or however that's spelled!) flick Lady in the Water this afternoon with my good pal Carrie.
I had heard a lot of criticism of the film, but still wanted to see it for myself...especially when Carrie (who had seen it once before) told me how much she liked it.
Do you want my 2 cents?
From a strictly critical standpoint, I can understand the gripes about elaborate exposition and such.
From a personal standpoint, I quite enjoyed it--maybe the themes being addressed over the actual script itself, but many things really resonated with me.
As in his film Signs, M.N.S. really addresses the struggle of faith within the plot. Another similarity between the two films is the idea of personal quirks working out for good in the end. I was also quite touched by the portrayal of how our deepest wounds in life can be redeemed and eventually used for good. And you get a great example of how each of us may have different callings, but we're all important/connected/etc. (Body of Christ, anyone?)

Carrie and I had a very inspired discussion after the movie, but I think rather than rehash all of our thoughts, I'd prefer to encourage you to see the film for yourself and see what strikes you.
If you take my advise and then feel like you wasted two hours of your life, then go get some Rad na to enjoy...it'll make everything better. ;)

You know, time just slips away from me so quickly these days. I'm hoping that when I move a little closer to work, I'll get at least a little more oomph back into my system. For those of you who I might owe an email to (or Five if you're Foxx), I just want you to know that I'm thinking of you and will do my best to keep up correspondance as I can...
Ciao for now

God Writing #16: Authentic Evangelism Part II

[This pic is from a prison ministry called Operation Starting Line]

5/19/06
Continuing from last week on my mode of 'authentic evangelism'...
I ended with suggesting that having public coversations about God and how He's working in our lives gives outsiders a chance to safely eavesdrop, and therefore may be key in sharing our faith.

Similarly, I believe in the importance of public prayer. Let me clarify that to begin with. I'm not saying, "Let's get prayer back into schools/sporting events/town meetings/etc.!" To try to force a group of people containing non-Christians to pray together seems ludicrous to me. The kindest atheist in such a situation would likely be annoyed, at best. Strong-arm people into a spiritual practice they don't believe in? WHY?!! To leave an even more bitter taste in their mouths?

On the other hand, I also think it's laughable that legislators think they can keep prayer out of school. No law or outside authority can keep students, teachers, speakers, or visitors from communing with God in their hearts. Furthermore, if a group of students would feel motivated to huddle together for a quick prayer break between classes, I can't imagine that they would be reprimanded.
School is a very high profile locale for prayer, but what about any other public domain--restaurants, coffee shops, malls, amusement parks, etc.?

I also think the level of conspicuousness isn't what's important. From time to time, I will see patrons at a restaurant table all bow their heads, close their eyes and go at it. God bless 'em! Sometimes I am one of these people myself. Other times, I recognize Christians with less-traditional mindsets praying for each other with their eyes open and looking around, while their body language indicates a normal conversation is taking place. God bless them too! What a great way to not make the people around them feel 'weirded out'. Indeed, those who do feel emboldened to pray in a conspicuous situation should be careful to heed Jesus' warning in Matthew 6. Our hearts shouldn't be filled with pride, hunger for attention, or a desire to be viewed as pious.

1 Thessalonians 5:17 urges us to "Pray continually." Obviously there are different types of prayer for different occaisions. As the Holy Spirit guides us, I believe we'll recognize when it is appropriate to pause and quietly lift our hearts up, and when it is appropriate to find a corner where we can lean our heads together and verbalize.

One of the coolest life experiences I've had was praying with a group of friends at Disneyland. It was dusk and we were preparing to say goodbye (an Until-we-meet-again sort of goodbye). We formed a huddle in front of Sleeping Beauty's Castle--3 Kiwis, 2 midwesterners-turned-Californians, and me. It was dark, and we were out of the way, but I think as we stood there with our arms around each other, it was a clear testament of God's presence in that place.

Another component of authentic evangelism--Keep it Real. 1 Peter 3:15--"But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect..."
What happens when a fish bites? Someone asks, "Why are you a Christian?" or "Why do you live like that?" Is the next logical step a theological smack-down? Do we have to take a moment to strategize how we can incorporate a ten point conversion plan into our answer? How we can lead someone down "Roman's Road"? How we can get them to attend a church service with us?
If the Spirit leads you in such a way, then I guess you'd better go for it. But if not, does that mean you've failed and should be stripped of your heavyweight title?

I think not. It's like in retail or any other business. People with a sales mentality often come across as rude and pushy, making more enemies than friends. Sales people with a marketing mentality on the other hand (aka You have a legitimate need and they can offer you a legitimate solution), are happy to give the customer all the info they desire, and then let them make up their own mind on if they want to make the purchase or not. This practice lends itself to both high consumer satisfaction and high employee morale. I know that when I'm walking through the mall, I will go out of my way to avoid pushy salespeople standing at kiosks or shop doors. I believe this attitude easily carries over into the spiritual realm too.
So what would be a wise response in said scenario? How about simply answering the question? If the Holy Spirit is tugging on someone's heart, that person will probably keep asking--and all the more if they see you won't try tackling them in the process. The Holy Spiriti is who is responsible for winning converts--not us--though He often uses us in the process.

John 9 tells of a great example of this. Jesus heals a man who was born blind. When the Pharisees catch up with this guy, they demand an explanation. In verse 17, they ask him about Jesus: "Finally they turned again to the blind man, 'What have you to say about him? It was your eyes he opened.' The man replied, 'He is a prophet.'"
Pretty simple, eh? It continues (vs. 24&25)--"A second time they summoned the man who had been blind. 'Give glory to God,' they said. 'We know this man is a sinner.'
He replied, 'Whether he is a sinner or not, I don't know. One thing I do know. I was blind but now I see!'"
We see that the Pharisees in this story couldn't stop themselves from further investigation (vs. 26&27).
"Then they asked him, 'What did he do to you? How did he open your eyes?'
He answered, 'I have told you already and you did not listen. Why do you want to hear it again? Do you want to become his disciples, too?'"
This guy didn't play around!
Vs. 28-34 unfold the rest of the story. The Pharisees don't favorably respond to the man's story, but they do give him an awesome opportunity to air his thoughts which culminate in vs. 33: "'If this man were not from God, he could do nothing.'"
Sometimes our simple stories of what God has done for us have significantly more impact than speaking of our doctrine or lists of rights and wrongs.
Unfortunately, the Pharisees were not eager to embrace Jesus, even after hearing the blind man's testimony. But what about the people who were observing the whole thing from the sidelines? I'd hazard to guess that God touched some hearts in the process...

Paul and Silas's experience in prison was also very remarkable. After being severely flogged and having their feet locked in stocks, they don't pass out in exhaustion or even complain about their circumstances.
Acts 16:25 tells us, "About midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening to them."
Paul and Silas were not preaching to the other prisoners. They were not trying to strike up conversations in hopes that an opportunity to slip the gospel in would arise. They weren't even indignantly speaking of the injustice of Roman law and how God's judgement was coming. Instead, they were living their faith--singing and praying and seeking comfort and strength from the only source they knew. And the other prisoners noticed!

As I'm reflecting on these thoughts, it occurs to me that plenty of people might disagree. I just want to reiterate that I think God loves diversity and uses it all the time. What works as evangelism for some might seem impossible for others. What constitutes evangelism for me might seem a tragic cop-out to you...
Obviously the main thing is to let the Spirit guide us. He knows what He's doing. Ultimately, maybe evangelism comes in degrees. My concept of authentic evangelism may very well be a base-level idea, but what I wish we'd all consider is this--As Christians we need to live out our faith in every aspect, every compartment of our lives, including our public lives. Inviting others into our personal games of "Follow the Leader" before we live out the rules ourselves might be yielding the fruit of discontentment and disillusionment rather than the abundant life Jeuss has prepared for us. Let's take responsibility for what God places in our hands, and leave the rest to Him.

On Ears and hearing

Tonight at work I learned it's a faux paus to tuck one's ears underneath one's Starbuck's hat...even if it feels more comfortable.
I was appropriately humiliated by my coworkers, and have thus learned my lesson.
Rest assured, from now on, preparing for work will include checking "Where My Ears At?"

In other news, I am headed for beddy-bye, but decided to skim this article on MSN first about home remedies and their effectiveness. Among the scads of info I came across this blurb:
---------------------------------

Need Zzzs? If tomorrow's to-do list keeps you up tonight, take some advice from Suzanne Segerstrom, PhD, an associate professor of psychology at the University of Kentucky. "I discovered my secret remedy for insomnia as a stressed-out grad student: Listening to an audiobook until I fell asleep," she says.

Research confirms the effectiveness of her method; the brain works like a tape player—with one main auditory loop that processes words. "If you fill that loop with an interesting book, there's no room for your own worrisome internal narrative. Some people find sounds like running water helpful, but for those who have continuous thoughts running through their heads, it might be necessary to replace that verbal speak with other verbal speak."

-------------------------------
So there's proof for my method of falling asleep listening to music. I've encountered many a person in my day that needed silence (or at least lack of talking/singing/musical instruments) to drop off, but for me the opposite is often true.
And now I have scientific backing for if anyone wants to give me further static on the subject!
I guess I also have to admit that my pal Foxx's method of sometimes listening to the weather channel's robotic vocalizations as she drifts off now makes sense too...
Oh, we who have stuff perpetually going on in our noggins...

Nice

There's something extremely satisfying about realizing you pulled off parallel parking in one fell swoop....
I really like my new car. :) I've had some spatial-distance learning experiences (ahem), but the chemistry is all there between me and Cash so I think we'll be just fine.

In other news...it's very possible I will get this apartment I looked at on Monday night. It would be a huge blessing in a lot of ways (including having an old friend as 1 of 2 roommates), not least meaning I wouldn't have to succumb to the torturous process of further apartment hunting...
Any prayers offered up on my behalf are always welcome.

Cheers!
"Tie yourself to the mast, my friend, and the storm will end..."--The Verve

A couple of noteworthy items...
1)Alice Cooper is currently embarking on building a teen center in Arizona! Very cool...but come on Vincent, why not LA?! ;)
Thanks to Chad C. for supplying me with the following link:
http://www.breitbart.com/news/2006/08/01/D8J7RR580.html

2)Anyone who lives in LA and digs Gomez...Ian Ball is playing a show at the Hotel Cafe this Friday night! The horrific part is that I just found out yesterday and therefore can't make it. Alas! If you go, I expect a full report.

3)According to VH1, the group Incubus is about to release their next album. Yay! Hopefully it will be as good as their last...

My Sweet New Ride...

Ok, this pic is a representation of what I have, not the real thing...

God is good, you know?
If you remember when I was having trouble with my Chevy Cavalier back in MN this past spring, I posted a request for anyone who had it in their heart to bless me with a vehicle they might not need anymore. I was only half-joking. ;)

When I got to California in June, I thought everything was peachy when I got wind of a car donated to a local church, and offered to me for free. I pounced on it...weirdly enough I had thought that car was a Honda Accord, but it was really a Ford Taurus...anyway!
After jumping through some red-tape hoops, I got the car registered and insured, then driven by someone else to a local mechanic's only to discover that it required about $2,000 in repairs.
Hmmm...for a car with over 500,000 miles on it (I kid you not!), that didn't seem to be a good option for me.

Thankfully, good old, generous pal--Mr. V--was kind enough to lend me his car in the meantime. He lives close enough to work that he can walk, and he willingly did so...very much appreciated on my behalf!

But the latest news is that a dear friend out here found it in his heart to pass on his old car to me when he upgraded for a slightly newer version. I was given the car on Sunday night...shiny, black, and well-groomed. :)
Hooray!
I have waffled on naming cars since I first began driving.
First there was Bob, then my Grand Am went nameless. The Cavalier I dubbed, "Mr. Ed" but didn't refer to it as such so often. If nothing else I guess I can name this one and see what happens...
What to name it? That's a no-brainer.
As it's completely black, I'm currently reading a bio on Johnny Cash, and the friend who gave it to me gave me 2 Johnny Cash cds at the same time--one being the first cd I played within the car, I think it's obvious the car is meant to be referred to as Cash. (And it's also saving me a bundle of the green as I don't have to invest in a new vehicle for a while yet!)

So yippee-kye-yay, and all that jazz!
Thank you genereous friends and well-providing Heavenly Father.